Cover me...

I have become a master of disguise.  Of course, we all still know I'm fat, lol...but I feel that my back fat and belly rolls are usually well tucked, sucked or skillfully minimized with my clothing choices.  In other words, I look better with clothes on, lol.  I know it's cliche', but I want to look better naked.  I'm a water baby, I LOVE the beach.  I want to be able to just go and let it all hang out and not have to worry about my gut peeking through the side of my swimsuit bottoms (tankinis are the isht btw).  I don't want my knee fat to distract from my cute dresses, and I don't want to have to wear a shrug/bolero with all my cute dresses.

Exhibit A and B of me "clothed":

What a difference some threads make. 

How low can you go??

Okay, so now you've seen the pictorial evidence, let's get down to the stats.

Height: 5'10"
Weight: 375.0

Bust:  54"

Waist: 46"

Hips: 59"

Size: 3x or 24/26

Age: 30

No children

I've always been plus-sized, and always "wore it well" until the last couple years when my belly has expanded, along with my arms and thighs.  For the very first time, I cringe when I look in the mirror and hesitate having my picture taken.  I've always thought I was beautiful, always thought I was sexy...even wearing a size that started with a 2, lol...but now, it's just out of hand.  I just turned 30 years old and I would have never guessed that this would still be a struggle of mine.  I know that losing weight only gets harder as you get older, so I am determined to take control of this part of my life. 

The first thing I will be doing is getting active.  Right now I have TWO gym memberships.  I have a membership at a no-frills, basic gym that costs approximately $10 a month.  I feel more comfortable working out there.  I only do cardio, but I feel better doing it their than at the other gym.  The other gym is a more "traditional" gym, I pay $24.99 per month for that one, and I have this one because it enables me to take the step classes, zumba, and I have the option of implementing personal training into the mix (I don't currently take advantage of that now).  In time, I may drop the basic membership, but as of right now, this works for me.  I also have Zumba DVDs and moving forward, my goal is to do a Zumba DVD each morning before work, take a short walk at lunch time Monday thru Friday, and go to the gym in the evenings at LEAST 4 times a week.  I know it sounds ambitious for someone as out of shape as myself, but I have to go hard.  Being lazy has gotten me NOWHERE.  I need to establish some structure and I need to establish a pattern of hard work.  If I strive to be THIS ambitious, even if I "fail" once or twice, I'm still doing a hell of a lot better than what I've been doing.

As I said, I'm 375lbs (I would have never admitted that in real life) and I wear a size 24/26.  My long-term goal is to wear a size 16.  I will re-evaluate when I get there.  I don't have a particular weight in mind, I just know that I want to be a 16 or lower. 

So...let's go!

Go Big Girl what you gon' do??

So today, it begins.  I've had this blog up for a while, but have never sat still long enough to start it up.  Or maybe I was just stalling on putting in writing exactly how fat I am.  Today I'm bloated, as I am on day 2 of my cycle, and I know I'm about 4-5lbs heavier than normal (she's a beast), but today is the day...

The purpose of this blog is to document via pictures, measurements and food/exercise diary in a way that I can be totally honest.  This will begin anonymously.  I would be far too mortified to share the pictures and true weight with even  my closest friends, so hopefully...somehow, I will gain a follower family that will encourage me and keep me going.  Several of my close friends have lost a good bit of weight recently and I have been gleaning information from them and hope to find my own way.

Here are a few pictures that I took today (10-10-10), and hopefully I will start to see some changes soon.  My measurements will come in the next post.

If you're reading, thank you.  I appreciate any and all positivity you can send my way.

FatGirlSlim